So, today, I had lunch w/M...my co-worker/friend. We discussed our current guy situations...he told me about the fact that his guy has an ex-bf and "business partner" whom he still lives with. Apparently the man has put the downpayment down on a condo for his "business partner" and the move out of the current domicile will occur sometime in September. We will see. Meanwhile, it is my suspicion that the "ex" part is not as far along as my friend was previously led to believe. But, still, he continues to move forward with this...even though he's been requested to stop looking at women and to be accountable for almost every minute that he's not with his guy friend.

Meanwhile, there's me. I'm wary of the entire situation. And, with good reason. I don't really feel like having my heart stomped on again...once a season should be good enough for me...and it's still summertime...so I'm not about to willingly hand my heart over on a platter and say "have at it" to anyone...even someone who seems able to meet my own sexual expectations in person. So, I find myself holding back a lot...and, being indecisive about how to proceed in the relationship...for the simple reason that I am unsure about everything...and I am tired of being the first one to fess up my true feelings or thoughts. Of course it can't just be about the sex...it's never that simple...well, it can be, but then it wouldn't mean too much. It's more than just the act of penetration... even I have learned that much. I wish I could just be content with that...this is all confusing now.

Well, for now, I'm in "wait and see" mode. The way I see it, to do anything else would only be detrimental... right?


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